Santarchy!
What The Ho?

Welcome to the worldwide Santacon nexus, the orginal resource for Santarchy events across the globe.

Every December for the last 15 years, Cacophonous Santas have been visiting cities around the world, engaging in a bit of Santarchy as part of the annual Santacon events.

It all started back in 1994 when several dozen Cheap Suit Santas paid a visit to downtown San Francisco for a night of Kringle Kaos. Things have reached Critical Xmas and Santarchy is now a global phenomenon.

You'd better watch out! Santa's coming to town!

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"You'd Better Watch Out:
Portland Santacon '96"

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Santarchy! Mini-FAQ

  1. For the most part Santarchy! is an archive only. We don't do any active planning on this website, however we will mention upcoming Santacons that have their information posted online.

  2. If you are looking for Santacon planning info, try contacting your local lodge of The Cacophony Society or the Santacon and Santarchy tribes.

  3. We do not condone or encourage any kind of vandalism or violence at a Santacon event. Our santas do not destroy property, steal merchandise or do harm to others.

  4. Santarchy is not a movement, that's what you do in the bathroom. In addition to that, the annual Santacon events are not a protest against Christmas or commercialization. Really, it's just a bunch of santas getting together to have a good time.

  5. We do not provide or sell any stock photos or video footage and all images on this website are copyright of their owners. If you want to use any photos or videos on this website, please contact the owner directly.

  6. We do not do interviews with the media and so on. We're not actively involved with organizing any of the Santacon events (see #1), so if you are looking for people to interview, try contacting the organizers of various regional Santacon events.

  7. We have absolutly nothing to do with any idiot santas you may have heard about in New Zealand. Contrary to misreporting by the media, they are not associated Santarchy or the Santacon events.

  8. If you came here looking for Chuck Palahniuk, he's the one drinking cheap tequila over here.

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hohoho AT santarchy DOT com

Make sure to mention what which city it took place in.

Who?

This site is maintained by Santa Squid (retired), with occasional input from Santa Melmoth (retired), both veterans of the great Santa wars 1994-98.

With special guest bloggers Santa de Nada & o'Santa Bin Laden

Santa's Bag



San Francisco Santarchy 2006

posted by Santa de Nada on November 29th, 2006

On December 9, cheap suit Santas will gather where it all began: San Francisco. Details below.

HO,

Gather your Elves.
Fluff your Reindeer.
Be jowly.
Don your gay apparel.

Santa is on the move.

This is the firm date and will not change, rain or shine.

WHAT TO BRING:

* A Santa suit held together with zip ties and sticky remains of last year’s beverages and bodily fluids. (NOT just a santa hat.)
* CASH for drinks, bribes and tips (TIP YOUR BARTENDERS. Santa tips well.)
* $5.50 for ferry (if coming from Oakland)
* $1.50 for MUNI (in quarters) (MUNI has NO CHANGE MACHINES)
* An unmarked drinking vessel for beverages to supplement bar drinks
* Santafication tools (to make others into Santas).
* A ball
* Toys/gifts (Naughty and Nice)
* Mistletoe
* Niblets (optional)
* Lube and condoms (elf size too if you’re into that sort of thing)
* Sex toys
* The Baby Jesus
* Comfortable shoes – because Rudolph will become too drunk to cart your sorry ass around.
* Warm clothes – Santa goes all night long
* NO CROCS

WHERE AND WHEN:

Oakland (pre Santarchy):

* 8:30-9am – East Bay Gathering
Heinhold’s First and Last Chance Saloon 56 Jack London Square, Oakland
* 10:00am- Ferry Trip
Oakland to SF Pier 41
Don’t be late or you’ll be waiting for about 2 hours for the next ferry.
Purchase tickets onboard the ferry – $5.50 One Way
www.eastbayferry.com/when/printable.html

SF (Main event)

* 10:30am – San Francisco Gathering at Carousel @ Pier 39. Santas get on for ½ price: $1.50
* 11:30am – Santarchy begins.

TIP YOUR BARTENDERS

Be jowly.

THE FOUR FUCKS:
Don’t fuck with KIDS
Don’t fuck with THE LAW
Don’t fuck with SECURITY
DON’T FUCK WITH SANTA

Tag yer photos/video/etc: santarchysf06



11 comments

11 Responses to “San Francisco Santarchy 2006”

  1. trackback by tribe.net: santarchy.com
    on Monday, December 4th, 2006 at 7:49 pm

    The Funnest…

    You may be wondering, what is the funnest thing of all?
    In my book it has t……

  2. trackback by tribe.net: santarchy.com
    on Monday, December 4th, 2006 at 9:15 pm

    HO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!…

    Oh, yes. It’s that time of year again. Santa Con is just around the corner an……

  3. comment by Bootie
    on Tuesday, December 5th, 2006 at 2:22 pm

    Santarchy Afterparty: December 9th

    Club Bootie @ the DNA Lounge 11th & Harrison
    FREE ENTRY TO FULLY DRESSED SANTAS

    To show our Santa Love, we at club Bootie are offering anyone from Santarchy who is dressed up as Santa (or Ms Claus, Santas Elf) to get in FREE at Bootie all night.

    Bootie goes 9pm – 3am, and it’s the BOOTIE Holiday party that night, with our own ‘drunken Santa’. :-) We’ll do an hour of holiday and xmas mashups 10pm-11pm, Smash Up Derby plays at 11pm a couple live xmas mashups in their set. DJs before and after the band spinning all kinds of fun mashups. (From Olivia Newton John to Run DMC to the Ramones to Mettalica to Gwen Stefani to the Killers…)

    If you’re still standing after all day carousing, we’d love to see a sea of scary santas Saturday!

  4. comment by LazySanta
    on Tuesday, December 5th, 2006 at 3:09 pm

    Dear Santa

    What about us bad santas that can’t quite make it up and out by 11:30 a.m.? Any thoughts on how we can join in all the reindeer games a bit later on? (Zeitgeist’s mid-afternoon last year was so much more civilized, doncha think? )

    -Santa

  5. comment by Patrick Whitehouse
    on Tuesday, December 5th, 2006 at 3:39 pm

    Hi Santa,

    I’m the organizer of last year’s Oakland to Sacramento contigency– 40 Santas made the run.

    This year we plan to ‘rest’ by setting up a guerrilla bar, complete with music and chilidogs. Think of it as a Santa hydration station on the Big Tour.

    We hope the main Santa Contigency can make contact with us for a brief stop. We’ll be more ready than any bar in SF.

    Currently, we plan to setup just south of Pacbell park, along the waterfront.

    Can you make contact:

    patrick@endicia.com

    Santa Ed, Santa Brice, Santa Smooth, et al.

  6. comment by RG Wong
    on Thursday, December 7th, 2006 at 6:30 pm

    News sez it’s going to rain this weekend. What do we do?

    - Santa Psycho

  7. comment by RG Wong
    on Thursday, December 7th, 2006 at 6:32 pm

    What do we do if it rains?

  8. comment by mick4recycle
    on Saturday, December 9th, 2006 at 4:55 pm

    reindeers

  9. pingback by æ blogs | squozen » Blog Archive » Uncanny Convergence
    on Sunday, December 10th, 2006 at 11:18 am

    [...] Lucky 13 also happened to be the final destination of SantaCon / Santarchy ‘06. The place was overrun with drunk Santas… hundreds of them. They were probably having more fun than anyone else in The City last night. For those with Santa fetishes, if there was one night to take home your very own Santa, last night would have been the night– what a pick-up scene. It was shameless. [...]

  10. comment by Santa de Nada
    on Sunday, December 10th, 2006 at 6:24 pm

    What to do if it rains: Curl up into a fetal position in a corner, blindfold yourself, then await further instruction.

  11. pingback by Laughing Squid » Zombies Invade San Francisco Santacon
    on Tuesday, December 12th, 2006 at 11:03 am

    [...] It turns out that a horde of zombies infiltrated last Saturday’s San Francisco Santacon 2006. Jason DeFillippo was there and shot a bunch of great photos of the Christmas carnage. [...]

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