On December 9, cheap suit Santas will gather where it all began: San Francisco. Details below.
Gather your Elves.
Fluff your Reindeer.
Don your gay apparel.
Santa is on the move.
This is the firm date and will not change, rain or shine.
WHAT TO BRING:
* A Santa suit held together with zip ties and sticky remains of last year’s beverages and bodily fluids. (NOT just a santa hat.)
* CASH for drinks, bribes and tips (TIP YOUR BARTENDERS. Santa tips well.)
* $5.50 for ferry (if coming from Oakland)
* $1.50 for MUNI (in quarters) (MUNI has NO CHANGE MACHINES)
* An unmarked drinking vessel for beverages to supplement bar drinks
* Santafication tools (to make others into Santas).
* A ball
* Toys/gifts (Naughty and Nice)
* Niblets (optional)
* Lube and condoms (elf size too if youâ€™re into that sort of thing)
* Sex toys
* The Baby Jesus
* Comfortable shoes – because Rudolph will become too drunk to cart your sorry ass around.
* Warm clothes – Santa goes all night long
* NO CROCS
WHERE AND WHEN:
Oakland (pre Santarchy):
* 8:30-9am – East Bay Gathering
Heinhold’s First and Last Chance Saloon 56 Jack London Square, Oakland
* 10:00am- Ferry Trip
Oakland to SF Pier 41
Don’t be late or you’ll be waiting for about 2 hours for the next ferry.
Purchase tickets onboard the ferry – $5.50 One Way
SF (Main event)
* 10:30am – San Francisco Gathering at Carousel @ Pier 39. Santas get on for Â½ price: $1.50
* 11:30am – Santarchy begins.
TIP YOUR BARTENDERS
THE FOUR FUCKS:
Don’t fuck with KIDS
Don’t fuck with THE LAW
Don’t fuck with SECURITY
DON’T FUCK WITH SANTA
Tag yer photos/video/etc: santarchysf06